Hey there! If you know me you have heard me say this again and again. I say it because I believe it. If you want to be more confident you have to practice being confident. You aren't born with it, it's not taught in school. You don't inherit it like eye color. But you can learn it. Think nature vs. nurture. If your parents are confident you see that modeled on the regular. But in not, then you don't always know what it can look like it.
It's not bragging for bragging's sake. It's not putting others down to build yourself up. It's knowing that you can do anything you want to. It's knowing that you can wear the clothes you love, listen to the music you enjoy, read books that you can't put down, and more!
So many women feel pigeonholed into believing that if they don't weigh a certain weight or look a certain way they are flawed. Society has created a vision that is un-realistic.
I am here to change that narrative and help you be the best version of you that you can be. It all starts with looking in the mirror.
What do you like when you look in the mirror? Don't say nothing....that is old you thinking. I want you to find one thing...anything you like. Your eyes? Your hair? Your earlobes? Just pick one thing and every single day you look in the mirror and tell yourself what you like. This activates a part of your brain called the reticular activating system. It's a behavior that allows you to hear your name in a crowded room, or see all the yellow cars.
When I help women lose weight and build confidence it's one of the first things we do. I found that it's incredibly helpful to start with something positive. Your brain is hardwired to always go negative. It does that to help keep you safe. Like when you are driving you are always looking for hazards, traffic, and pedestrians. It's just time to change that thinking when you are lookin at yourself.
Pick one thing you love (start with like if that is where you are today) and keep telling yourself over and over again.
You will start to believe it. Then you can add on something else. You know you can be your own worst critic. If it helps, think about what you would say to your bestie, your sister, or better yet....your daughter. If you can't do that, talk to a younger version of you. Tell her what she needs to hear to feel beautiful, loved and safe.
You don't have to hear it from other people to believe it. You need to hear if from YOU.
This helps you love your body because you can't change something you hate. You will never hate yourself to your goal weight. It's just not possible.
Think of all your past diets. They were full of restriction and deprivation. You were hungry, frustrated, and white knuckling your way down the scale. Only to gain it all back (and more) and then you feel like a failure. You are not a failure. The diet industry has failed you.
When you start to change your relationship with your body you can then change your relationship with food.
I know .
I did.
Today I actually love my biceps, even with some loose skin. I think I have great boobs (so does my Freddy). I also think I have strong thick legs and slender ankles. I am 50 years old y'all and it has taken me over 30 years to love these parts of my body. It takes time and practice. You will get better at it.
Then and only then will you love yourself enough to make changes that move the needle. The # on the scale is just data. The size of your clothes is just a number. We know this is true.....even clothing manufacturers can't even get that right. So wear clothes that fit you well, right now. You can always buy a different size when you need it.
You might be asking yourself "but what if that size goes up? Won't that defeat the purpose?" That is entirely up to you. If you start loving yourself and weight loss is your goal, aren't you more inclined to take care of things you love instead of things you hate?
I'd love to hear back from you. Let me know what you think.
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